MlNI-METHS – GALLOWAY, SCOTLAND. 14-15 December, 1996
Ian (Mad Axeman) Mason
reports:
Present: Ian (Mad Axeman) and Sadie Mason, Mad Mike and
Verena (Muesli) Petzold, Eric (Polevault) Scott,
Willie (Willy) and Letha McCorquodale, Brian (Air Malawi's Last Hope) Sayers,
Gordon (Hairy Beldoon) Beldon and Stewart (Lightning)
Halliday1.
It
is not clear who should write this report. Mike conceived the idea for the meet
but left the organisation to lan2 such as
deciding a route and finding out which Bed & Breakfasts, inns etc were open
and daft enough to expect guests at this time of year.
Anyway
here goes: As can be seen, a remarkably
large number of lunatics turned out. Most met up on the Friday evening for a
briefing, a few beers and a jolly good reunion.
The
party set off from Bruce’s Stone, Glen Trool, in
pouring rain and low cloud obscured the tops. We ascended by the Shiel Burn to
about the 1,000' contour at which point the rain, strong wind and low cloud
made us decide it really was pointless to proceed with the original plan for Lamachan and Curley Wee. Instead we went down and on to
White Laggan Bothy, where two old3 gentlemen from Girvan had got the fire
going. The warmth was most welcome and the place soon became like a Turkish
bath with steaming wet clothing and sweaty socks. After lunch it was back to
Glen Trool. The wind had now increased to gale force
and it really was not umbrella conditions.
Beldon‘s celebrated boots,
that gave him so much trouble in 19874, played him up despite5 having been repaired by the
clog maker in Balmaclellan, and shed a heel.
An
extremely convivial party took place at the Mason's that evening6 and the last
revellers fell out of the door at about 3.00 a.m. It was not surprising that
the Axeman was late on the tee next morning. Five off us eventually tee-ed off
at 12.30 p. m. rather than the 11.00 a.m. start7. A somewhat erratic round of golf
then took place. Participants were not at their best. Petzold definitely did
not win8.
Eric has played better. Sadie was steady despite the cold. Spectators fell
about laughing. It is believed that Axeman and Lightning drew on the last green
A few survivors made an evening of it at the Creebridge Inn and Mason
had no difficulty winning a
Tetley T-shirt by drinking ten pints, with some assistance it might be added!
EIM
1. Stuart (Lightning) Halliday
travelled via Amsterdam
in order to cover the 25 miles between Douglas, Isle of Man,
and the rendezvous at Newton Stewart near the Scottish coast.. Other
Meths members should take
note
of this fine example of triumph over adversity
(there is no longer any
ferry or flight service
between IOM & Scotland)
2. This technique is known as 'delegating”
3. i.e. about Mason's age
4. Beldon only dons his boots once every 10 years. We
look forward with interest to 2007.
5. Or perhaps ’because
of"
6. Among
the highlights were lan &
Sadie's celebrated steak pie and murphys washed down
with a dozen bottles of dry red, Unshackling
the Mugs Ceremony, when Muesli's & Axeman's METHS mugs
were
relieved of their
Mtn. Club padlocks, Mike having found the keys again - (Mason's washing up is now 4 lbs lighter
and
he no longer has to get down to his beer); Hairy Beldoon and AMLH left before midnight (a lowlight) and so missed Mason's
schizophrenic metamorphosis (a
highlight) when he appeared in a Bahrain Hash t-shirt
& festooned with caving equipment, headlamp and helmet - by this stage he didn't know whether he was hasher,
climber, caver or tiddlywinks champion. We reckon
he was just pissed. Another highlight was listening to Mason's steam
gramophone playing scratchy recordings of Winston
Churchill’s war speeches and an old lady
reminiscing about Queen Victoria's diamond jubilee - Polevault thought
that was a lowlight.. UP THE EMPIRE!
7. We agreed to meet at
10.00 not 11.00 a.m. Mason
arrived at 12.30 p.m. two and a half hours late, smelling like brewery cum distillery. Despite
this handicap, he proceeded to play very good and uninhibited
golf, undoubtedly as a consequence of
the other participants keeping their distance.
8. This
is correct.
© METHS, 2023